Teaching Children About Repentance

In my last blog post, I wrote about Kids and Communion. That following Sunday, in God's providence, we had two children in our congregation pray to receive Christ as their Lord and Savior. In both cases, they prayed to receive Christ after asking and learning about the elements of communion (the bread and the cup).

This past Sunday, we got word from our Children's Ministries Director that six more children indicated their desire to receive Christ following the Bible lesson on repentance.  We use Generations of Grace, which is a biblically based and God-centered curriculum designed for children three years old through the sixth grade.  The GoG motto is "Teaching the whole counsel of God to the next generation." Over a three-year period, this curriculum covers the Old Testament historical books, the life of Christ, and lessons from Acts and Revelation.

One of the features our teachers love about this teaching material is the flexibility it affords. When asked how he taught the children about repentance, the children's teacher for this past Sunday replied,

The curriculum really lent itself to an altar call. It's not something I would do regularly but it seemed to fit in with the message which was based on Matthew 3:1-12, the preaching of John the Baptist. We started by reviewing the previous lessons about the birth of Christ and I pointed out how amazing it was that Christ would leave the perfection of heaven to live in a place like this with sadness, sickness, pain and death.  But that he did it because of his love for us.   

Then we talked about how John was sent to prepare the hearts of the people for the coming of Jesus. His only method of preparation being one of repentance. I illustrated repentance by having my daughter Ellie walk away from me (life of sin) and then when I said "repent" she would turn and run back into my arms. I emphasized that God was always willing and ready to embrace every repentant sinner. I then explained (in costume as John including live crickets) that by his manner of life John set himself apart from the religious elite of the day as he pointed people to confession and repentance.   

We talked about how the Pharisees demonstrated a false repentance. I illustrated this by reading them a book which on the cover looked like the story of The Little Three Pigs, but when I started reading it they immediately recognized it as The Three Billy Goats Gruff. I made the point that God is most concerned with what's on the inside. I also had my kids come up and asked them if the fact that I was a doctor made my children doctors as well. In the same way we cannot rely on our parents' faith for salvation as the Pharisees were doing.   

Finally we looked at verses 11-12 which describe Jesus' baptism with the Holy Spirit or with fire. I told them that this referred to salvation and judgment and that the ONLY way to escape the coming wrath was to turn from their sins in repentance and place their faith in Jesus. I then asked if their was anyone who had never actually done this for themselves. Several kids raised their hands. I told them if they wanted to repent now to not be afraid and come forward. Six children came forward and with them gathered around me I thanked the Lord for their repentance and faith.  [My wife] Cheryl followed up with the parents, giving them a booklet describing the plan of salvation.

Praise God for parents and teachers who faithfully teach the Word of God to children. I think this is a classic illustration of the maxim that the more you put into something, the more you'll get out of it. Yes, God is the one who gives the growth (1 Cor. 3:7), but he delights to honor those "those who labor in preaching and teaching" (1 Tim. 5:17; cf. Psalm 126:6).

Kids and Communion

Years ago when our children were young, my wife was sitting with them in the pew while I as pastor led our church family in communion (a.k.a. the Lord's Supper). Afterwards my wife told me that our son, a pre-schooler at the time, got all upset because his older sister got to have a "snack" during the service, but he didn't.

Probably every Christian parent has experienced a similar incident at some point in a church service. This raises the question, When is it appropriate for children to participate in communion, that is, to partake of the bread and cup? 

Because I have an affinity for acronyms, I am going to use them as a tool in addressing the above question. The first answer, represented by the word "CUP," represents our church's "official" stance on the issue. Children may, at the discretion of their parents, participate in communion when they have met the following criteria:

Conversion 

They are able to articulate the gospel and give a credible profession of faith in Christ as their Lord and Savior.

Understanding

They understand the meaning of communion, i.e. the significance of the bread and the cup.

Personal Commitment 

They are intentional about confessing sin and obeying the Lord.

When these basic conditions are met, children are allowed to participate in the Lord's Supper, so far as the church leadership is concerned.

However, I'd also like to share some additional thoughts on a personal level. This is based on my own experience as a parent and as a pastor for the last 23 years. Other good and godly parents may disagree on some points, which is fine.  I simply want to provide some food for thought.

If I had the opportunity to go back and do it all over again, I would have established a little more stringent criteria for my own children. These criteria, represented by the acronym "BREAD," are what I would encourage parents to consider as guidelines for their own children:

Baptism

Jesus commanded all his followers to be baptized as a public profession of their faith in him as Lord and Savior. Since the ordinance of baptism is no more difficult to understand than the Lord's Supper, it makes sense to have a child participate in communion only after he or she has obeyed the Lord by being baptized.

Respect

Scripture says, "whoever eats the bread and drinks the cup of the Lord in an unworthy way will be guilty of sin against the body and blood of the Lord" (1 Cor. 11:27). Communion is not to be taken lightly and must be treated with respect. Waiting to have our children partake of communion until they can do so reverently shows wisdom on our part as parents.

Examination

Self-examination is a key part of communion. Failure to do so results in discipline (see 1 Cor. 11:27-32). We want to make sure that our children are mature enough to conduct an honest examination of themselves. 

Appreciation

As our children comprehend the significance of the Lord's Supper and undergo appropriate self-examination, they are better able to appreciate afresh the atoning sacrifice Jesus made for them. In this way they are able to celebrate the feast with sincerity and truth with the family of God (1 Cor. 5:8; 11:33).

Devotion

How do we know if our young children are truly devoted to Christ or simply wanting to please their mommy and daddy? Discerning this can be difficult, even for the best of parents. Once our children head into their teenage years, however, they begin to think and act more independently. Their level of commitment to Christ is often easier to discern at this stage in their life than during their pre-teen years. 

Much more could be written on this subject, but I hope these brief considerations will help you to disciple your children in a manner that seems most pleasing to the Lord. Even if your child is not yet ready to partake of the bread and cup, the communion service provides a wonderful teaching opportunity for us as parents to share with our children the gospel of Jesus Christ and the beautiful significance of communion. The same goes for baptism.

In closing, consider the words of the 19th century bishop, J. C. Ryle:

Are we in the habit of coming to the Lord's table? If so, in what frame of mind do we come? Do we draw near intelligently, humbly, and with faith? Do we understand what we are doing? Do we really feel our sinfulness and need for Christ? Do we really desire to live a Christian life, as well as profess the Christian faith? Happy is the soul who can give a satisfactory answer to these questions. Let him go forward, and persevere.

May God help us as parents to put these questions first to ourselves, then to our children.