Drawing from the Well of the Hidden Word

My day got off to a rough start.  Instead of waking up to my alarm, I was awakened first (around 5:30 a.m.) by the ringing of the telephone.  Whenever the telephone rings that early, my first thought is: "Somebody died."  Thankfully that was not the case.  The person on the other line was a homeless, pregnant woman needing some help.

"How did she get my number?  Why of all people is she calling me?  What does she expect me to do?  Does she think that we pastors keep a bunch of money around for early morning emergencies?  I'll bet she's just another con artist looking for some quick money. . . ."   Shamefully, these were my initial thoughts.  But then a certain verse came to mind:

"He who is kind to the poor lends to the LORD, and He will reward him for what he has done" (Prov. 19:17).

Almost immediately my mindset changed, and I asked the Lord to give me His grace and wisdom as I dealt with this situation.

What's interesting about this verse is that it did not just "pop" out of nowhere.  I had just read it in a devotional reading before bed two nights earlier!  And it just wasn't a cross-reference, either.  It was the headline verse, and the devotional was a pastor's written meditation on it and what it meant.  At the time I read it, I thought: "That was nice ... some good insight" - but that was about it.  It wasn't until approximately 30 hours later that the relevance of that verse hit me in a very personal and practical way at a critical hour.

This was a great reminder to me of how important it is to digest God's Word on a continual basis.  "Thy Word have I hidden in my heart, that I might not sin against Thee" (Psalm 119:11).  Here I had begun to sin with an unsympathetic, selfish attitude, yet God rescued me from my sin by bringing to mind that Scripture that had been my recent focus of meditation.

You see, at the time we're reading any given Scripture, it may not impress us all that much right then and there.  We may not see its relevance right away.  But the fact is, we are filling the well of our hearts with the water of the Word.  Then later, when the situation calls for it, some key Scripture comes to mind - a promise, blessing, or command that God brings to mind as His Spirit draws from "the well of the hidden Word."  You can imagine how glad I was when God caused that verse to come to mind early this morning.  I thought, "Ah!  Now I see why God had that verse for me!  Thank you, Lord!"

Imagine how much more interesting, blessed, and adventurous life would be if we filled the well of our hearts with God's Word more consistently and conscientiously.  Oh, what we miss when we don't!

By the way, God brought everything together in a marvelous way with that needy woman.  Within a couple hours, we were able to get her the help she needed by expressing the love of Christ to her in a tangible way and, most importantly, by sharing with her the Good News of salvation.

How is your "well," by the way?  Is it deep or running dry?

18 Tips for a Terrific Marriage

This past Monday, August 18, Ruthie and I celebrated our 18th wedding anniversary.  Although our marriage is far from perfect, it is healthy and thriving.  We can honestly say that we love one another more deeply and passionately than ever before.  

At the same time, our hearts go out to our friends and fellow church members who are distressed or discouraged over the state of their marriage.  Their relationship is characterized by conflict and frustration rather than love, joy and peace.

In his book, When Sinners Say "I Do": Discovering the Power of the Gospel for Marriage, author Dave Harvey begins by presenting three biblical principles in relation to a Christian marriage.  I have thought about these over and over, and I am convinced that if couples would remember and apply these principles on a consistent basis, their marriage would be transformed:

1.  God's Word is the foundation for marriage.

2.  God's glory is the focus of marriage.

3.  The Gospel is the fountain of marriage.

By God's grace, Ruthie and I can say that we see these three principles actively at work in our marriage.  Again, let me stress that our marriage is far from perfect!  But we are happy and fulfilled in our covenant of companionship. 

As you can see, the three principles stated above are very basic and broad.  While we would encourage you to get the book (wherein Harvey expounds upon these principles), we thought it would be helpful to share with you some personal tidbits on how we apply these principles in everyday, practical ways in our own marriage.

Considering that we just celebrated our 18th anniversary on the 18th of August, we decided to share "18 Tips for a Terrific Marriage."  When I asked Ruthie to help me with this project, she spent some time working on this while I was at a ministry meeting.  When I came home and asked her if she came up with some practical suggestions, she said, "Yes, but instead of eighteen, I came up with twenty-four!"

After some slight revisions, we have boiled down Ruthie's original list to our "quota" of 18 tips, by making the additional suggestions fit as sub-points elsewhere.  I thought you should know, up front, that Ruthie came up with this list.  So while I concur with everything that she said and have included some Scripture references and a few additional comments, these are suggestions coming from a wife's standpoint, with the hearty endorsement of her happy and fulfilled husband.  So here they are, in no particular order:

1. Look for the things you love about your spouse, not the little things that irritate you (Phil. 4:8).
   
2. Make time to talk (even about the everyday things) a real priority.
3. Keep short accounts with one another.  Don't let bitterness or resentment build.  Note:  Timing is everything when it comes to bringing up a sensitive or stressful situation.  Late at night when you're both tired is usually not the best time to resolve a disagreement.  The key to not letting the sun go down on your wrath is to give it to the Lord (Psalm 4:4-5), not to "give it" to your spouse right before bed!
4. Try to discuss things of the Lord and His Word (Psalm 19:165), and pray together as often as possible (Eph. 6:18; 1 Pet. 4:7-8).
5. Be thankful and appreciative for all that your spouse does, whether monumental or mundane (1 Thes. 5:17).
6. Be intentional about keeping courtship and romance alive in your marriage (Song of Solomon 1:15-16; 2:2-6; 7:10):  (a) Take the time and effort to make yourself attractive to your spouse; (b) Make "date night" a regular priority - be creative, it doesn't need to be costly; (c) If at all possible, go to bed at the same time, don't have a TV in your bedroom, and make sure you're clean and fresh - it's conducive to snuggling!  (d) Be sensitive to meeting your spouse's sexual needs (1 Cor. 7:3) - remember it's not all about you ... and you are usually glad you did! :)
7. Be sure both your husband and kids see that he is the final authority in the home.  Husbands, be sure your kids see how much you love and respect your wife.  Insist that they honor their mother as well (Prov. 31:28).
8. Never criticize your spouse to your kids; bring your concerns to him or her in a right spirit, and in private, once you have examined your own heart.  Note:  United, loving parents give a huge sense of security to their children.
9. Don't assume the worst about your spouse in a given situation; remember, love believes the best (1 Cor. 13:7).
10. Make every effort to keep your home - and particularly your bedroom clutter-free and inviting.
11. Make sitting down to dinner together as a family a priority.  In the end, sports and guitar lessons pale in comparison.  If dinner simply cannot work out, then make it some other meal.
12. Don't nag or manipulate to get what you want.  While it may bring short-term results, it will bring long-term damage.
13. Remember to lift up your spouse in prayer daily.
14. Try to make your home as stress-free as possible, so that coming home is a pleasant, not miserable, experience.
15. Don't speak negatively of your spouse to others, and always be ready to defend him or her if someone does.  (This does not mean that you excuse or endorse the sin of your spouse, but that you handle things in a loving, biblical manner, wherein you seek to uphold his or her honor.)
16. Make a conscious effort to encourage and build up your spouse, always being there to help him or her in any way you can.  You should be your spouse's number-one encourager.
17. Don't let money matters ruin your marriage.  Wives, don't complain about what you don't have materially; it makes your husband feel inadequate as the provider.  Besides, we are to set our minds on the eternal, not the temporal (2 Cor. 4:18; Col. 3:1-2).  Do your best to stretch the house-hold dollar.  Be a good steward of what God has already given you.  Be content with what you have (1 Tim. 6:8).  Husbands, be as generous to your wives as possible.  Be more generous to them than you are to yourselves.
18. Make your marriage the central relationship in the home (apart from your individual relationship to Christ, of course).  While children are God's gifts and welcomed additions to the family, they are not the central feature of the family; the marriage relationship is (Gen. 2:24).  Make sure that your schedules and activities reflect the priority of the marriage relationship.  In addition to preserving your marriage, this will bring more benefit and security to your kids than you can imagine.

Well, there you have it!  May these practical tidbits be a help and encouragement to you, as pursue a healthy and vibrant marriage to the glory of God!

"Respectable Sins": A Must Read for Every Christian

I read a lot of books, and a lot of endorsements regarding books.  Many endorsements include the highly complimentary and promotional phrase, "a must read."  Yet this expression is used so liberally, one can't possibly read all the books that he "must."  And let's face it: the only real book that we "must" read is the Bible.  It is the Word of God and the ultimate standard by which every other book must be judged.

Having said that, let me add that Jerry Bridges' latest book, "Respectable Sins: Confronting the Sins We Tolerate" is a must read for every Christian.  I say that because its message is both radically and refreshingly biblical.  It addresses head-on the "acceptable sins" that tend to go unchecked in our lives.  While condemning the "major" sins of society, we too often excuse and overlook the more subtle sins in ourselves.  Instead of addressing them, we accommodate them.  Yet the Word of God speaks clearly on those matters where we tend to be silent.  Here are some of the sins that Bridges discusses in his book:

Ungodliness

Anxiety and Frustration

Discontentment

Unthankfulness

Pride

Selfishness

Lack of Self-Control

Impatience and Irritability

Anger

Judgmentalism

Envy and Jealousy

Sins of the Tongue

Worldliness

Now, if you're like me, you look at a list like that and initially think, "Oh, great.  It looks like I'm in for some real beat-up sessions."  But let me assure you that while this book is convicting, it is also very encouraging and motivating.  It didn't leave me feeling "beat up" but highly desirous to get the victory over troublesome areas in my life through the power of the Holy Spirit (in fact, the author devotes a whole chapter to this before addressing any of the specific sins).

I liked this book not only because its message is highly relevant and timely for believers today (particularly those living here in America), but also because of the manner in which the message is delivered.  Three characteristics in particular really stood out to me:

The author is precise.  That is, he does very well in defining and describing the specific sins he is addressing.  Though he says outright that he is not intending to be overly technical, I found him to be very articulate and biblically accurate in his handling of these topics.

The author is personal.  By this I mean that Jerry Bridges is very honest and transparent regarding his own struggles in some of these areas.  Furthermore, he communicates in such a way that you feel like he's sitting in your living room discussing these things in a calm but earnest manner over a cup of coffee.  I appreciated the assessment of pastor/professor Ligon Duncan, who wrote, "I can't think of any partner with whose help I'd rather tackle my own heart sins than Jerry."  I think you'll end up feeling the same way as you read this book.

The author is passionate.  He is passionate about Jesus Christ.  He is passionate about pursuing holiness.  And his passion is contagious.  I found myself not being beat up so much as built up.  Don't get me wrong: this book was very convicting.  But it was also marvelously motivating.  The Lord used it to make me all the more grateful for His grace and for Christ my Savior.  Consequently, I found myself wanting to rid my life of anything displeasing to Him.

So this is definitely a book worth buying.  Read it with an open heart, and you will no doubt be blessed by it as you heed what you read.

Wallets, Worry, and Walking in the Spirit

My day started off wonderfully.  I got up, poured myself a cup of coffee, sat outside enjoying the beauty of God's creation, and opened my Bible to see what the Lord had for me this morning.  It was a wonderful time of communing with my Savior.  For a few brief moments, it was like no one else was in the world but me and my God.

Soon after having my devotions, I had to drive to a location about 15 minutes away to get some work done in a relatively quiet spot.  On the way there, I was singing to the Lord and had a very conscious sense of being filled with the Spirit.  I thanked the Lord for getting my day off to such a good start, for the joy of His presence, and I prayed that this would continue throughout the day.

All went well for about an hour, then came the test.  While walking from one place to another, for some reason I reached back to feel for my wallet in my back pocket.  It wasn't there.  I went to where I was sitting; it wasn't there, either.  I went up to the counter of the coffee shop where I had made a purchase, thinking I left it there.  It wasn't there either, and none of the staff had seen it.  My heart began to race.  You know the feeling!  My driver's license, cash, credit cards, and the like were all in there.  I got all worried and distraught as I continued looking for my wallet.  A couple employees helped me.  Finally, I was able to find it on the floor, having traced back my steps.  It had fallen out of my back pocket (which in this particular pair of shorts is pretty small).  I breathed a sigh of relief as I sat back down and resumed working.

But as I did so, I thought of how quickly I moved from walking in the Spirit to worry.  One quick change in circumstances is all it took!  To be more precise, I found myself struggling between worry (walking in the flesh) and trusting in the Lord (walking in the Spirit).  I know this because even as I was guilty of worrying, I was praying the whole time, asking the Lord to calm my spirit, to help me to give this situation to Him, and to show me where my wallet was!

In this one little incident I was reminded of the great struggle of the Christian life - the struggle to keep my focus on my Savior instead of my circumstances.  Scripture tells me to "be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication" to let my requests be made known to God, offering them in a spirit of thanksgiving.  This can only come by the Spirit.  In and of myself, I am weak, frail, and always vacillating.

Well, thank God I found my wallet.  More importantly, I praise Him for being so patient with me.  How glad I am that He who started His work in me will complete it till the day of Christ Jesus (Phil. 1:6).  Why?  Because the One who calls me is faithful, who also will do it (1 Thes. 5:24)!

Live so as to be missed

Reconnecting with old friends has been fun.  I've been doing this for a couple of weeks now, sneaking in a moment here and there, as I'm able.  Some acquaintances go back more than two decades to my adolescent years.  It's cool to see kids that I've grown up with now married with kids of their own.

But probably one of my greatest joys has been to get reacquainted with the teens that I shepherded from 1991-1994 when I served as Associate Pastor of Student Ministries at Immanuel Baptist Church in Richmond, Virginia.  One kid that was just coming into high school when I left is now serving in the same position!  What a joy it was to see how far he's come in his theological convictions, philosophy of ministry and such.  "I have no greater joy than to hear that my children walk in truth" (3 John 4).

One of the teens I was able to contact came from a really good family (many of them did, actually).  I especially remember how tight she was with her brother, who was two years older than she was.  They were both in the youth ministry in that same short period of time that I was the youth pastor.  Her brother was a tall, clean-cut kid who loved the Lord and was mature beyond his years.  He was good-natured yet very earnest about spiritual matters.  Without a doubt, he was the best-behaved boy in the youth group (as I recall), and his outward compliance stemmed from his inner character.

So in my correspondence with this young lady, I asked her how I could get in contact with her brother.  You can imagine my shock and sadness as I read her response:

Hi Pastor Matt! 

It was very nice to get your message. I have really enjoyed being able to reconnect and catch up with people through Facebook. I hope you and Ruthie and your kids are all doing well. 
I guess you have not heard yet, but on June 20th this year, God called James home to be with Him. He died instantly of a massive heart attack while on his lunch break. He leaves behind a wife and 2 daughters, ages 2 and 4. It was a huge shock, and our family continues to deal with his loss. However, the Lord continues to prove Himself a good and faithful God. Even in this, we trust His plans and purposes, and we rejoice that [he] is with his Savior in heaven. 

James always spoke fondly of his time with you in the youth group. He loved his trip to New England/Canada that you all went on that one summer. 
If you would like to know more about his life or have any questions, please feel free to ask. I love sharing about my big brother!
Take care and the Lord bless!

Sincerely, 
Sarah

What a great testimony to a life well-lived.  This young man lived only three decades, but what a life he lived!  I wasn't there for the last half of it, but apparently it continued to be lived to God's glory.  

I thought of another young man that died around the same age - only it was nearly two centuries ago.  His name was Robert Murray M'Cheyne, and he, too, lived a very full life within a very short period.  He was a dedicated preacher in Scotland, and he had not completed more than twenty-nine years when God took him.  Andrew Bonar, a close friend of M'Cheyne who wrote his biography, said:

Wherever the news of his departure came, every Christian countenance was darkened with sadness.  Perhaps never was the death of one, whose whole occupation had been preaching the everlasting gospel, more felt by all the saints of God in Scotland. . . .  He himself used to say, "Live so as to be missed;" and none that saw the tears that were shed over his death would have doubted that his own life had been what he recommended to others. . . . His work was finished!  His heavenly Father had not another plant for him to water, nor another vine for him to train; and the Saviour who so loved him was waiting to greet him with his own welcome: "Well done, good and faithful servant; enter thou into the joy of thy Lord."

No doubt my young friend James heard those same words as he was ushered into glory.  And I can't help but notice how the rock-solid theology of his family has been used by God to strengthen them in this time of sorrow.  They attribute all things to the sovereignty of God - the God who loves them and who works all things together for their good, as ones who have been graciously called by Him.  

Here we find a lesson for all of us - to "live so as to be missed" by living a life of service to others for the glory of God, and to know this God intimately so that when tragedies come, "we have an anchor that keeps the soul steadfast and sure while the billows roll."

A Father's Love and Joy

At the risk of embarrassing Ed Chisam, a devoted servant of the Lord here at First Baptist Church (and who is probably reading this blog), I am going to use him as a launching pad for today's topic at TruthWalk.

Earlier today, another Christian brother and I joined Ed for lunch to discuss some important ministry items.  Our meeting lasted a little more than an hour, and I praise the Lord for all that we got accomplished in that short period of time.  But I also thank the Lord for the additional blessing He gave me, and that was to see the love of a father for his baby girl Rebecca.  A few things stuck out to me:

- He smiled on her repeatedly throughout the meal.

- He held her closely and played with her gently.

- He informed us that she would be four months old on August 9.

- He told us what a joy she was and how much he loved being a dad.

- As we left, Ed stayed behind an extra moment to tend to his daughter's needs.

I could say more, but these expressions of love were, to me, a wonderful reminder of the love that our heavenly Father has for each one of His children.

- He makes His face to shine upon us.

- He holds us close and has promised to never leave us nor forsake us.

- He knows and celebrates the day that each one of us became His adopted son or daughter through faith in the Lord Jesus Christ.

- He rejoices over us, His children.

- He lovingly, graciously, and patiently tends to our individual needs.

Again, more could be said.  But hopefully you get the point.  

You know, there was something that Ed said near the end of the meal that showed the superiority of our heavenly Father's love over that of the best earthly father's love.  After some concentrated discussion, Ed remarked something like, "Wow, Rebekah has been so quiet, I forgot that she was sitting here!"  Yet it's amazing to think that with millions of adopted sons and daughters all over the world, no matter where they are or what they're doing or not doing, God knows each one intimately.  In the course of directing all human affairs and every molecule in the universe, God never once forgets about a single child of His - not even for a nanosecond!  We are always on His mind; He has us always in His heart.

Often I find myself praying that I would be the kind of father to my children that my heavenly Father is to me.  But today I was also reminded that we can thank the Lord for giving us, through parenting, a reflection of our heavenly Father's love for us.  His is a perfect love, one that is infinite, unconditional, and eternal.  "Nothing in all creation can separate us from God's love for us in Christ Jesus our Lord!" (Romans 8:38-39 CEV).